a friend sent me this, it's actually pretty damn hilarious.

Before Marriage:

John - Ah....At last. I can hardly wait!

Jane - Do you want me to leave?

John - NO! Don't even think about it.

Jane - Do you love me?

John - Of course! Always have and always will!

Jane - Have you ever cheated on me?

John - NO! Why are you even asking?

Jane - Will you kiss me?

John - Every chance I get!

Jane - Will you hit me?

John - Hell no! Are you crazy ?!

Jane - Can I trust you?

John - Yes

Jane - Darling!

After marriage (Read from the bottom back to the top)